It snowed. It snowed so much the entire country just closed for the weekend. There were no trains running between Brighton and Southampton whatsoever, cruelly preventing Cécile and me from spending the weekend together. Because I have handed in all of my essays and there is still another week before the next semester starts, this left me with a frightening amount of time of 'not really much to do actually'. I always long for free time so much when I'm busy but then when I actually get it I look at pictures of famous album covers with kittens instead of people while watching The Jeremy Kyle Show at the same time. But not this week, this week I will do things that are fun, interesting and stimulating. Such as:
- Crochet an owl cushion.
Yes I realise this is a bag but I want a cushion. It will actually be nothing like this photo, but talking about DIY project without photos is boring. I have already started working on it and it might turn out awesome, potentially. Will post pictures when it's done which should be soonish if I don't get sidetracked. Also crocheting is awesome and not lame at all.
- Write something on this blog everyday. I will post something everyday Monday until Sunday. And it has to be something that is actually somewhat interesting.
- Prepare really well for the next semester. I will get all the books. And have a look at them before the first lecture. And get separate notebooks for each of the modules. If I go into the semester well-prepared it will be so much easier to actually do all the work and not think 'fuck it' halfway through and end up having to do an insane amount of work at the end. I say this before every new semester but that doesn't mean that this time I couldn't actually do it, right?
Which I appreciate because I love lemons. Loose leaf tea with fresh lemon juice are what gets me through days like this, when I have to painstakingly force myself to write an essay. Or days when I have to prepare Dutch lessons and have mental breakdowns and convince myself I have no talent for anything whatsoever.
Of course that isn't true, I have for example a semi-decent talent for writing music reviews for Southampton uni's awesome magazine The Edge. I will be doing more of that!
I have also finally discovered the mythical place that is Jesters nightclub. Apparently officially the worst club in the UK, but LOADS OF FUN! It is disgusting and cheap BUT part of the ultimate Southampton experience.
While I was busy procrastinating, I remembered polyvore. And I remembered how it is nearly as much fun as shopping except without spending money. And since I haven't taken any outfit pictures in the past few days, I will just leave you with some polyvore realness.
I may have my precious red Litas but that will not stop me from dreaming about owning pairs in every colour to match every single outfit I would ever want to wear
My new wintercoat from H&M! It hasn't been cold enough yet to wear it. Always buy a wintercoat before it actually gets cold, but then when the awful weather does start you will still be a bit happy because you can wear your coat.
I would literally die for a pair of plastic Vivienne Westwood shoes.
Coming soon: pictures of my shoes. You know you want to see them.
I was in London with my awesome friends Cecile and Rosemarijn and now I miss them and am also ill and feeling lethargic and a bit lonely so I need to write to make myself feel less useless.
I need to complain about something for a second. Dear every person I meet who doesn't live in Southampton and has never actually been there: don't tell me Southampton is a shit town. First of all, I don't care about your opinion. Also, it is actually a very enjoyable place for me to live. It is lively, big enough for there to be lots of stuff to do but small enough for it to still have a certain cuteness to it. I also definitely benefit from the fact that it isn't as big and popular as where I'm used to living: I live on the ground floor in a big, beautiful shared house with a huge garden and parking spaces. In Amsterdam I live in a tiny studio flat in a 15 storey concrete building with a shared kitchen in a bad area for the same amount of rent. There is literally not one thing that I don't like about Southampton as a city. You know what's a shit place to live? Uithoorn, where I grew up. There is absolutely fuck all to do because it's too close to Amsterdam to even try to be exciting in itself, as a teenager living there the absolutely only fun thing in town was the bus to the big city, yet most of the people living there hardly ever leave the town except perhaps to go to equally miserable shitholes like Aalsmeer, Mijdrecht or Kudelstaart. Even having lived in a 'cool' and exciting place like Amsterdam for the past few years, living in ANY city feels like a privilege when you're from a dead, grey, suburban town. The most ironic thing is actually that people who themselves still live in towns very similar to Uithoorn have told me that they would only move abroad if it was to some big exciting city like London or New York. And somehow make it looks like I am the one 'playing it safe' by moving to a smaller city. And last but not least, I actually came here to study at the university and not to be a cool hipster. I was very, very privileged to get the chance to study abroad at all. Some people can't even go to university in their own area, let alone do a year abroad in their favourite country. What I mean to say is, fuck you I like where I live a lot and surely that's more important than the opinions of people I have absolutely nothing to do with.
Not caring about other people's opinions is, in fact, still a radical thing to do. So I look in the mirror and reassure myself, I AM AWESOME, I AM A WRITER, I AM BEAUTIFUL, I AM SUCCESSFUL, I AM INTELLIGENT, I AM WORTH IT, and I strut down the streets of the city I choose to live in in my Jeffrey Campbell boots, with a peacock feather in my hair. I am making my own dreams come true, and the world's insistence that it should have an opinion on that can never, ever bring me down.
